Someone at Capcom decided that making video games isn’t fast enough when it comes to separating folks from their cash, and they’ve now made it easier to just give them money directly.

Consumer Reports, via their sister site DefendYourDollars.org (DYD), had a closer look at the new Capcom-Unity PrePaid Visa cards and found some fees they thought would-be Capcom cardholders would find worthy of an Admiral Ackbar meme.

According to the site, “To purchase the card, it’s $9.95. Then there’s a monthly fee of $4.95. If you want to put more money on the card, you have to pay the reload fee (a fee you would pay on any VISA cash card, including this one)–which is about $4.95 at participating retailers.”

When the Capcom card was announced last month, the LA Times reported that “to make the card more attractive, Capcom will allow cardholders priority access to nightclub events surrounding the launches of its games.”

“The card can be the secret decoder ring for fans to get into the Capcom treehouse,” Capcom spokesman Chris Kramer said in the LA Times story, but unlike the World of Warcraft visa, which is an actual credit card with no annual fee and offers 0% for the first year, the fees for the Capcom Prepaid card seem to be stacked higher than Chun-Li’s roundhouse.

“You even get charged fees when you call customer service, $0.25 [per call, not per minute] to call an automated line and $1.50 [again, per call] to speak with a representative,” DYD reports, “As boring as it may be, sticking with your blander current payment card might not be such a bad idea after all.”

A complete list of fees associated with the Capcom-Unity Prepaid card can be found at http://www.prepaidcardholder.com/fl/capcomfl.html

It’s cute that Capcom thought they’d get one over on us … about as cute as a fireball to the face.